2D conjugated metal–organic frameworks (2D c-MOFs) are emerging as electroactive materials for chemiresistive sensors, but selective sensing with fast response/recovery is a challenge. Phthalocyanine-based Ni₂[MPc(NH)₈] 2D c-MOF films are presented as active layers for polarity-selective chemiresisitors toward water and volatile organic compounds (VOCs). Surface-hydrophobic modification by grafting aliphatic alkyl chains on 2D c-MOF films decreases diffused analytes into the MOF backbone, resulting in a considerably accelerated recovery progress (from ca. 50 to ca. 10 s) during humidity sensing. Toward VOCs, the sensors deliver a polarity-selective response among alcohols but no signal for low-polarity aprotic hydrocarbons. The octadecyltrimethoxysilane-modified Ni₂[MPc(NH)₈] based sensor displays high-performance methanol sensing with fast response (36 s)/recovery (13 s) and a detection limit as low as 10 ppm, surpassing reported room-temperature chemiresistors.